When you’re mental, holding on is something that you get quite good at doing. You ‘hang on in there’, you ‘cling on’, you ‘keep on going’. After a while, you get quite good at all that holding on to stuff.
I’m good at holding on. I’ve been mental enough to not want to be alive for more than half of my life and I’m still here. How’s that for holding on?
Today though, I’m thinking of the things I let go of so that I could keep on holding on. The people I loved, the things I cared about, everything I wanted to be – so many things that I had to let go of just so I could hold on to something. I don’t even know what the something I’ve been holding onto is.
We’re all holding on, aren’t we? I feel like I’m holding on to nothing much. What are you holding on to?
I think I’d rather have held on to the things I let go than whatever it is I’m holding on to now. Does that make any sense whatsoever?
This is a short post. It’s about holding on and that’s what we all do. I’m just not sure what I’m holding onto anymore. Boo hoo: