Dear Person

Dear Person,

You have been there in the background for too long now, and tonight is the night when I say enough is enough. It is time for you to leave me behind and I you.

I suppose you will wonder what has brought this on. The answer, is time. The time that I’ve had to make sense of everything that didn’t make sense until I had time.  Last night you sent me a message and fifteen minutes later you chased it up wondering what on earth could be the matter that I hadn’t responded within fifteen little minutes. Tonight, I guess you are busy, because there has been no message and no chase up and you don’t seem to be interested in what on earth might be the matter.

It always was on your terms – whatever it was. I no longer accept your terms. I’m not here when you’re lonely and gone when you are not. I am here always, such is my way but such is not yours. I have been held back by ‘your terms’. By the words you threw at me – like ‘this might be the biggest mistake I’ve ever made’ or ‘do you want a lodger’ or ‘I’m so unhappy without you’. No more. No more your words and no more your terms. I’m not as vulnerable as you think.

Does this mean I don’t love you? Not at all. That I love you is the deepest, purest and truest thing I ever did or ever will do. Some things just are – they can’t be changed. But what I can change is my presence. I am here for me, in my life, in my world and not for you in your life, in your world when it suits.

I am learning lessons. I don’t suppose you expected that. But then again, I’m not as vulnerable as you think nor indeed as vulnerable as I thought.

Lots of love from WeeGee (being all cryptic but feeling great)

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19 comments

  1. So listen up. I want you to retrace your mental steps over the course of the last six days or so. Follow the thought patterns backwards until you recognize the exact place you were at (emotionally, not physically) when this shift first began to form itself in your beautiful (not broken) brain. Was it the moment when you chose to dismiss Ms. Helpful’s input? Because from my vantage point, it seems to be around that same time frame when WeeGee suddenly tapped into this sudden onset of self-awareness and true strength.

    Regardless, I am officially stroking your ego and I mean every word of it. How empowering it is to embrace our vulnerabilities, rather than run from them… The balance, of course, lies in your ability to set boundaries with the ones who have the greatest power to hurt you the most. Real strength isn’t a lack of sensitivity. It’s a deep sensitivity, embraced. The greatest people I’ve ever met are the ones who aren’t afraid to love completely and live vulnerably, but they’ve mastered how to do so within the boundaries of what is okay for them, and what isn’t. That is my idea of enlightenment. You can love someone forever, while you simultaneously let them go. Some people aren’t evolved enough emotionally to handle that concept. I believe that you certainly are.

    Thank you for sharing your life with us. Awesomeness. Times five. Squared.

    1. Thank you SO much for your lovely comment which makes all the sense in the world xx

      Ps. Sorry – I haven’t been ignoring your posts they just disappeared from my reader 😦

  2. I know it must have been very hard to come to this point, where you not only could but had to stand up for yourself. I’m sorry that person cannot be what you need. But I am happy to see that you are putting yourself first.

    -Nel

  3. Thank you. D’you know what? It feels good to assert yourself even if you start with the safety of WordPress. Hugs to you too – I think you are doing an amazing job 🙂

  4. Hugs beautiful.
    Good for you. Asserting oneself can be the key to happiness, as much as it does suck. You’ve done what is right, don’t ever forget it. xx

  5. I love this. It’s very intimate, but so strong and intelligent and emotive and wise.

    I (of course) don’t know the person it is addressing, but I do know that their life will be poorer for the lack of you. And yours will be richer for the choice you have made.

    Best to you.

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